Blog Archives

Derko Cup Abducted & Recovered!

We kept this under wraps this season, but now is the time for full disclosure on one of the darkest moments in OFHL trophy history. The DERKO Cup went missing earlier this year after Rolphy left it on the seat of his HVAC van when doing a service call. “It was just a regular day, nothing special,” said Rolphy. “I headed out for my first call, buckled the Derko Cup into the seat beside me – I take it on every call to show the clients – but after the call, I noticed it was gone and this note was left behind.”

Rolphy quickly got in contact with the kmsh, who told him he better find the trophy before Derko finds out its lost or Derko will be devastated. Rolphy promised that, even if it’s his last act in this pool, he would search “Heaven and Earth and his underwear drawer” to find the Cup (plus the thought of Derko crying into his Sedins Pillow is disturbing.) It was suggested Rolphy first check Dinky’s basement accommodations in Sun Peaks – to no avail.

But as of this morning, we are happy to report that Rolphy used his “special skills” and has recovered the trophy in Nashville. The two have been spending some quality time re-acquainting in Music City.

Thanks to the Polie officers from Davidson County for securing the drop site for the safe return of the Derko Cup.

Rolphy & the Cup check out the “Yodelling Hall of Fame”

Side trip to Printers Alley to grab some Tennessee card stock for EZ. He’s a big-time collector.

Happy Hour at Hooters.

Finally, some skinny dipping in the Cumberland River just outside the Titans home field.

Next up, Dollywood!


Week 23: Cordy Crowned Champ With One Week to Go!

Cordy: 2016-17 OFHL Champ!

There’s still a week to go in the regular season, but Cordy wrapped up his 10th OFHL Championship and first since 2011-12.

The Party has started at The Dirty Dangler Brewpub in Russet Bluff

Cordy finally relinquishes his 3-year hold on The Derko Cup and will pass that down to Rolphy as The Big Rig has locked down 2nd spot.

There are still a few things to be decided this coming week. The battle for 3rd will be decided as Fulty sits just 2 points ahead of Derko.

T-Man (who had the top week with 50 points) will take the 5th money spot as with 79 points he can’t catch anyone or be caught. Pretty good for a guy who is managing his team from Thailand.

Here’s a refresher on the $ spots:

  • 1st place $200,
  • 2nd place $140,
  • 3rd place $100,
  • 4th place $60,
  • 5th place $40

These five teams will also be in the playoffs together for the 5th round draft pick.

The Second Tier:

Looks like this level is set with Haukster, Vinny, EZ, and GoJo all solidly in the Lottery spots. There is a mathematical chance that Erty could be caught by a late-surging Stifler, but a lot of things would have to align for that to happen. This tier will playoff for a 4th round pick.

Third Tier:

JBR jumped ahead of Orv this week as Orv’s parabolic season continues (and it’s a negative parabola)

Ren & Stimpy hold down the basement spot and will round out the bottom 4 who will playoff for the 3rd round pick in next year’s draft.


JBR had a huge week with the help of 8 points from Talbot ED, but it was Marchand BO who helped JBR jump over ORV in the standings with a 9 point week


It’s been a rumor amongst NHL forwards that Nik Kronwall suffers from a severely odoriferous case of on-ice flatulence, brought on by his pre-game routine of raw broccoli, coffee, and crab cakes. He vehemently disputes it, but the truth is evident.

Kronwall makes his “fartin’ face.”


Ah, fart jokes. Always funny.


The Hockey News came out with their Future Watch 2017 last week. Here’s how each OFHL franchise rates:

1 Keller AZ Derko
2 Puljujarvi ED JBR
3 Chabot OT Orv
4 McAvoy BO R&S
5 Eriksson Ek MN Vinny
6 Nylander BF R&S
7 Strome AZ Orv
8 Barzal NI Haukster
9 Sergachev MT R&S
10 Dubois CBJ Haukster

Ren & Stimpy have 3 of the Top 10 (drafted one, traded for the other 2.) Orv & Haukster also have reason to think things are looking up with 2 each in the Top 10.

Here’s a look at the number of Top 100 Prospects each team has, and how many Top 50 each has.

Prospects in the Top 100 In the Top 50
R&S 10 7
Orv 8 7
JBR 7 6
Derko 6 6
Haukster 5 3
eZ 5 3
Cordy 3 3
Rolphy 3 2
Fulty 3 1
Erty 3 0
T-Man 2 2
Vinny 2 2
Stifler 2 0
GoJo 1 0

R&S have a stable full of prospects, while GoJo looks like he could use a solid draft; grab more Bjorkstrand’s and stay away from the Luongos and Sedins.


Cordy 69 58 10 1 117 41 814 35.4 0.848
Rolphy 69 51 15 3 105 34 754 32.8 0.761
Fulty 69 45 20 4 94 41 734 31.9 0.681
Derko 69 46 23 0 92 33 704 30.6 0.667
T-Man 69 38 28 3 79 50 701 30.5 0.572
Haukster 69 35 32 2 72 34 656 28.5 0.522
Vinny 69 35 33 1 71 27 640 27.8 0.514
eZ 69 34 33 2 70 25 698 30.3 0.507
GoJo 69 29 37 3 61 21 620 27.0 0.442
Erty 69 26 40 3 55 28 581 25.3 0.399
Stifler 69 23 43 3 49 31 575 25.0 0.355
JBR 69 19 47 3 41 39 544 23.7 0.297
Orv 69 18 48 3 39 21 528 23.0 0.283
R&S 69 10 58 1 21 23 433 18.8 0.152


One week left, then playoffs:

  • Playoffs will run for the last two weeks of the NHL season
  • Teams will continue to submit weekly rosters for duration of the playoffs
  • Total points for all playoff weeks used to determine playoff winners
  • Playoffs will be tiered based on OFHL regular season final standings
  1. Tier one – all teams that finished in the money at the end of the regular season
  2. Tier two- those teams that finished out of the money but not in the bottom 4
  3. Tier three – the bottom 4 teams in regular season

The winners of each playoff tier will win the following

  • Tier one – a draft pick at the end of the 5th round in the next year
  • Tier two – a draft pick at the end of the 4th round in the next year
  • Tier three – a draft pick at the end of the 3rd round in the next year

That’s it. Have a good week, and….


Captain Obvious Defeats Derko in Little Fort

Derko proves he cannot read. Needs new lenses.

Random Stuff

Time for some fishing.

Carey Price was the big winner at the NHL Awards Night.

Carey Price of the Montreal Canadiens poses with, from left, the William M. Jennings trophy, the Vezina Trophy, the Ted Lindsay Award trophy and the Art Ross trophy after winning the awards at the NHL Awards show Wednesday, June 24, 2015, in Las Vegas. (AP Photo/John Locher)

Carey Price of the Montreal Canadiens poses with, from left, the William M. Jennings trophy, the Vezina Trophy, the Ted Lindsay Award trophy and the Art Ross trophy after winning the awards at the NHL Awards show Wednesday, June 24, 2015, in Las Vegas. Missing: THE DERKO CUP 2014-15

The Women’s World Cup team from Norway is a disgrace! Here’s why (with subtitles)

Sports on Earth ranked the NHL’s Most Tortured Fans. Listed here are the Top 10 & Canadian markets.

21. Montreal Canadiens (Stanley Cup Final appearances: 29. Stanley Cup wins: 22. Most recent title: 1993.)

They are the most successful franchise in NHL history, even if much of that success happened many decades ago. Since their 1970s dynasty, they’ve won two Cups, in 1986 and 1993 — not amazing, but not too bad either.

18. Winnipeg Jets (Stanley Cup Final appearances: 0. Stanley Cup wins: 0.)

The franchise has never won a playoff game, let alone a series, even dating back to their days in Atlanta. But the Jets (well, this iteration of the Jets, at least) have only been in town since 2011, so their current fans haven’t had much time to suffer. Frankly, hockey fans in Winnipeg were so happy for the NHL to return after the original Jets moved to Phoenix that it will be a while before they can be considered truly tortured.

14. Edmonton Oilers (Stanley Cup Final appearances: 7. Stanley Cup wins: 5. Most recent title: 1990)

Boy, do their glory days feel like a long time ago. The past decade has been especially painful: Since their unexpected run to the Final in 2006, they haven’t returned to the postseason, and have finished last in five out of nine seasons. There’s reason for hope: Connor McDavid.

12. Calgary Flames (Stanley Cup Final appearances: 3. Stanley Cup wins: 1. Most recent title: 1989.)

They won the only championship in franchise history in 1989, but they have had a couple of particularly bad dry spells since, missing the playoffs seven straight years in the ’90s and ’00s, then again for five consecutive seasons before getting in as a surprise playoff team this year.

10. Ottawa Senators (Stanley Cup Final appearances: 1. Stanley Cup wins: 0.)

They’ve yet to win a Cup, and only once have reached the Final.

9. Florida Panthers (Stanley Cup Final appearances: 1. Stanley Cup wins: 0.)

The Panthers joined the NHL a year after Ottawa, and just like the Senators, they have one Final appearance and no Stanley Cups. Ottawa’s fan base is more devoted than Florida’s (the Panthers were last in attendance this season), but Florida also has had to endure more lousy hockey.

8. Arizona Coyotes (Stanley Cup Final appearances: 0. Stanley Cup wins: 0.)

On the ice, the Coyotes haven’t been very good since arriving in Arizona in 1996, but it’s the off-the-ice craziness that has truly tortured fans. That drama is still unfolding, but it’s never a good sign for a fan base when the thing it should be happiest about is the fact that the team hasn’t left town yet.

7. San Jose Sharks (Stanley Cup Final appearances: 0. Stanley Cup wins: 0.)

This year, the Sharks missed the playoffs for just the sixth time in their history, but they routinely disappoint come playoff time.

6. New York Islanders (Stanley Cup Final appearances: 5. Stanley Cup wins: 4. Most recent title: 1983.)

On the one hand, the Islanders won an incredible four straight Cups in the early ’80s. On the other hand, the franchise eventually devolved into an absolute circus, from the John Spano debacle to the switch to the loathed fisherman logo to the regrettable 15-year contract they gave to Rick DiPietro. Fun fact: Alexei Yashin’s contract just came off the books this week.

5. Washington Capitals (Stanley Cup Final appearance: 1. Stanley Cup wins: 0.)

The Capitals have been around since 1974 and have never won a Cup. But it’s the past decade that’s really tortured fans, because expectations have been so high. Alex Ovechkin revived the franchise after the 2004-05 lockout, but the Caps still haven’t advanced past the second round since he came into the league, despite five division titles.

4. St. Louis Blues (Stanley Cup Final appearances: 3. Stanley Cup wins: 0.)

The Blues made the playoffs every season from 1980 until 2004, and in recent years, they’ve been considered a threat to make a deep playoff run. But they’re the only still-in-existence franchise from the NHL’s 1967 expansion that hasn’t won a Cup, and they haven’t even been to a Final since getting there in each of their first three seasons.

3. Toronto Maple Leafs (Stanley Cup Final appearances: 19. Stanley Cup wins: 13. Last title: 1967.)

A soap opera of a franchise that hasn’t won a title since 1967, and hasn’t even won a playoff series since 2004. Playing in Canada’s biggest city, they’ve got a rabid (if frustrated) fan base and are constantly under a ton of media scrutiny. Winning a Cup is the ultimate goal, but it’d be a step in the right direction to even bring some stability to the franchise and get it out of the laughingstock category.

2. Vancouver Canucks (Stanley Cup Final appearances: 3. Stanley Cup wins: 0.)

The Canucks have been around since 1970 without a title, despite twice getting to Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Final. Routinely one of the best teams in the West under Alain Vigneault, they just as routinely underperformed in the playoffs. They have many of the elements of a truly tortured fan base: no titles, a dedicated fan base and a couple of agonizing near misses.

1. Buffalo Sabres (Stanley Cup Final appearances: 2. Stanley Cup wins: 0.)

To clarify, we’re not even considering the double whammy of being a Sabres fan and a Bills fan. We’re just looking at hockey here. But Sabres fans, passionate hockey fans that they are, have it rough: zero titles since entering the league in 1970, and one of their two trips to the Final ended in controversial fashion. (Brett Hull is still trolling them over that.) There’s reason for hope: Jack Eichel.

Summer is here and time to practice your high-dives…like these 2 Filipino National Dive team members.

Looks like Orv diving into the Tough Mudder’s Arctic Enema after Fulty “persuaded” him to enter.

Remember the Pontiac Silverdome? It’s now abandoned and run down. However, Red Bull put one of its BMX riders up to one last performance at the crumbling stadium. Watch as Tyler Fernengel takes on the old dome.

Looks like the pictures of modern-day Chernobyl…..sad.

Looks like Nick Bonino is healthy and ready for the season to start (said no one ever!)



Don’t know which is the bigger concern — that Bonino is forced to roll out his back in a Whole Foods parking lot, or that it’s mid-June and he still has the beard.

In the news; A pitcher who is equally adept throwing right or left, and at living on land or in water.

amphibious pitcher

Some classic tennis coming up this summer. Get ready with Andy Samberg…

…or with The Royal Tenenbaums, featuring a big match played at “Windswept Fields”:

The Red Wings aren’t going to miss a beat. Check out this clip of new coach Jeff Blashill from the Wings’ 2014 prospect development camp. Gives you a pretty good idea what they’re getting.

Erty just ordered JBR’s “Draft oh-16” t-shirt today. I can’t wait to hear him say, “The Magic Unicorns are pleased to select Connor McDavid.”


But JBR probably won’t show so Derko will pick for him and mistakenly select David McConnor of the Scottish 3rd Division. He will justify the selection by stating, “He may be a soccer player, but have you seen him in yoga pants?”

Duncan “Freakish” Keith. King of the VO2 Max. Click on his 3rd grade promise to read the story.


Good on ya’, Tampa Bay Lightning Twitter feed.


Ad of the decade.


Some good research here by American Nate Silver:

“Professional hockey has an extremely regional following: it is extraordinarily popular in almost all of Canada, reasonably popular in parts of the northeastern and midwestern United States, and quite obscure elsewhere in the United States. These differences more than make up for the smaller size of Canadian markets. In fact, the typical Canadian team has considerably more N.H.L. fans in its market than the typical United States team does.” Did you read that Gary Bettman?

Silver is a analytics fan and researched Google search traffic for “NHL” is various media markets. His findings below show that Canadians are “avid fans”; Americans, more “regional fans.” The Canadian cities all scored above 50% except for Montreal (but that’s probably because Silver didn’t research “LNH” on LeGoogle.)

NHL Avidity 1

How about relocation? Seattle? Six Canadian cities show a more avid fan base than Seattle. Even Saskatoon has more NHL fans than Houston, Vegas, Milwaukee, or KC. Saskatoon.

NHL Avidity 2

If only “Wild” Bill Hunter hadn’t meddled in 1983, Saskatoon would be singing the Blues. Read it here.

saskatoon blues

Sorry Canucks fans, this is too good to pass up. The Province writers, in their desire to prove that their club is “Les Habitants” West, created the 101 greatest Canucks of all-time (yes, 101. I’ll get to that.) You’d expect to see the Sedins, Smyl, Bure, Linden, Naslund et al. on the list, followed by more obscure picks that only a die-hard would remember: #41 Chris Oddleifson, #67 Ivan Hlinka, #83 Garry Monahan, #88 John Gould, #93 Mark Messier (ooooohhhh, that’s gotta hurt!)  But the best? #100 Brent Sopel – Makes the list for picking up a cracker. Food can be dangerous, ask Dustin Penner.


101? No consensus. Alex Auld, David Bruce, Mats Sundin, Luc Bourdon, Nathan Lafayette. Lafayette (10 career points as a ‘nuck) is known for only one mythical, traumatizing event: hitting the post in ’94. It’s such an iconic moment in Canucks history because of legions of Canucks fans who grew up with the Mighty Ducks movies, and recall Coach Bombay telling young Charlie Conway the story of the championship game where he hit the post:
Bombay: A quarter-of-an-inch this way and it would have gone in. A quarter of an inch, Charlie.
Charlie: Yeah, but a quarter-inch the other way and you’d have missed completely.
Bombay: I never thought of it that way.
You gotta keep the faith, Canucks fans.

Enjoying the semis?

Semi Finals

From the ertyfiles


Welcome to the Club, Sid.


THN Draft Preview ’15 is out now. Draft is June 26th. Derko, set your PVR now!




1. Fulty 74 58 14 2 118 28 921
2. Cordy 74 57 13 4 118 40 907
3. Derko 74 45 28 1 91 20 875
4. Rolphy 74 44 28 2 90 24 778
5. Haukster 74 42 30 2 86 15 778
6. eZ 74 40 33 1 81 22 775
7. T-Man 74 35 32 7 77 22 785
8. Vinny 74 33 35 6 72 21 721
9. Erty 74 35 37 2 72 22 702
10. GoJo 74 32 41 1 65 32 733
11. Orv 74 31 40 3 65 23 697
12. Stifler 74 6 66 2 14 14 496
13. JBR 74 5 66 3 13 18 496


First time since 1994-95 that player points had to be used to choose the winner of the pool. Fulty and Cordy tied in points, but Fulty held a 14 player point advantage.  Here’s a run-down of the teams and their plight.

1st: FULTY 118 pts, 921 player pts. Fulty took over 1st place in week 13 and only relinquished it for one week on his way to the Championship. He also finished 1st in player points, beating Cordy by 14. 34 point improvement over last year. Team looks solid for next year at goal, D and forwards. The early trade for Lundqvist & Zetterberg, the pick-up of Klingberg, and a late surge from Benn, solidified any weaknesses he had, and made up for the loss of Patrick Kane. Likely a favorite to repeat.(Payout: $190 & the OFHL Championship Trophy)

2nd: CORDY 118 pts, 907 player pts. 2nd year he’s finished 2nd. Was leading early, but a 2-6 run early in the new year lost him the lead and he could never recover. Solid goal and D, but loses a lot of vets and will have to make some decisions about aging forwards. Trading away high picks the past few years has hurt. Still, should be in the money next year. (Payout: $130 and another yerar to enhance the Derko Cup)

3rd: DERKO 91 pts, 875 player points. A year of bad luck. Was in the running for a repeat in the early parts of the season, but a weak January (3-8) hurt his chances. Still, his 875 player points should have given him a lot more wins (he was 1 pt ahead of Rolphy in the standings, yet almost 100 more player points.) Still owns one of the best groups of forwards in the OFHL. Goaltending always an issue. (Payout: $90 and doesn’t have to touch the Derko Cup)

4th: ROLPHY 90 pts, 778 player points. Fourth straight year his points have gone up; had league’s biggest improvement over last year as he jumped up 49 points from last year’s 41. Goaltending was a strength of the team. I guess he took the threat of a Unicorn tattoo seriously. (Payout: $50 and won’t have to sleep at the Sun Peaks Hostel)

5th: HAUKSTER 86 pts, 778 player points. Had some early success, then his team took December off and, well, 5th it is.  Finished 3rd last year, and looks to be in the same range next year. Good goalies help. (Payout: $40)

6th: EZ 81 pts. Slipped a bit this year as he fell out of the money. Made a late charge but not enough; but at least he still has a lottery shot in this year’s draft.

7th: T-MAN 77 pts. Improvement over last year but too many ties. Some great young pieces that could challenge if it all comes together.

8th: VINNY 72 pts. Finished ahead of Erty by 19 player points. Good prospects need to arrive soon.

9th: ERTY 72 pts. Carbon copy of last year. Lots of kids coming up.

10th: GOJO 65 pts. Beat ORV by 36 player points. Still recovering from his 12-13 championship, but the rebuild shows flashes of brilliance.

11th: ORV 65 pts. This is what happens when your goalies get old, but it was an improvement over last years 52 pts.

12th: STIFLER 14 pts. Eichel or McDavid or ???

13th: JBR 13 pts. At worst, Eichel. or he trades it to Derko for 7 players, free contacts, and unlimited mushrooms at Tim Hortons.

Winners since the 2004-05 lock-out/strike season:

Year OFHL Winner Winning % Derko Cup Holder
2005-06 WENDY 0.760 Cordy
2006-07 T-MAN 0.760 Cordy
2007-08 CORDY 0.685 Derko
2008-09 HAUKSTER 0.731 Derko
2009-10 DERKO 0.760 GoJo
2010-11 T-MAN 0.736 GoJo
2011-12 CORDY 0.679 GoJo
2012-13 GOJO 0.714 Derko
2013-14 DERKO 0.722 Cordy

You’ll notice there have been a number of Champions since the lost season, but only 3 teams were worthy of holding Derko’s cup.

Fulty’s winning % of 79.7 is the highest since Cordy’s 0.827 in 2000-01 and Orv’s 0.810 in 2002-03.

DRAFT 2015

We need to decide on the draft order for round one. Will post after final order is decided.


Thankfully for Fulty, Jamie Benn had 10 points in his attempt to win the scoring race (which he did.)

Welcome to the NHL, kid.

Keegan Lowe played in his first career game Thursday for the Carolina Hurricanes against the Philadelphia Flyers and made a good first impression.  Lowe, the son of Edmonton Oilers president of hockey operations Kevin Lowe, fought veteran forward Vincent Lecavalier not once, but twice. The two dropped the gloves towards the end of the first period and it’s safe to say Lowe got the last laugh, or punch.

The two dropped the gloves again in the second period, this time with Lecavalier getting the better of the rookie.

When they heard, “Lecavalier hammers Lowe,” Oiler fans everywhere were hoping it was Kevin.


CAREY PRICE of TEAM CORDY takes it with 112 points.  Here’s the breakdown of the top players at every position:

Carey Price Mtl C 112
Braden Holtby Wsh R 110
Pekka Rinne Nas F 96
Marc-Andre Fleury Pit V 97
Jonathan Quick LA T 97
Ben Bishop TB F 93
Jaroslav Halak NYI C 92
Devan Dubnyk Min G 88
Kari Lehtonen Dal Z 88
Tuukka Rask Bos H 87


Jamie Benn Dal F 87
John Tavares NYI T 86
Sidney Crosby Pit D 84
Alex Ovechkin Wsh D 81
Jakub Voracek Phi D 81
Nicklas Backstrom Wsh C 78
Tyler Seguin Dal C 77
Daniel Sedin Van D/C 76
Jiri Hudler Cgy F/R 76
Nick Foligno CBJ Z 73


Erik Karlsson Ott C 87
Brent Burns SJ R 77
P.K. Subban Mtl F 75
Dennis Wideman Cgy Z 71
Roman Josi Nas Z 70
John Carlson Wsh C 67
OEL Arz F 66
Kris Letang Pit O 65
Tyson Barrie Col C/O 65
Justin Faulk Car T 64


Johnny Gaudreau Cgy D 64
Mark Stone Ott G 64
Filip Forsberg Nas O 63
Mike Hoffman Ott J 48
Kevin Hayes NYR C 45
Anders Lee NYI G 41
John Klingberg Dal F 40
Aaron Ekblad Fla T 39
Evgeny Kuznetsov Wsh H 37
Victor Rask Car J 33


LA Kings become fifth defending Stanley Cup champion in the expansion era (post-1966) to miss the playoffs the following season.

Of the NHL’s last 46 champions, only the 1967 Toronto Maple Leafs, 1969 Montreal Canadiens, 1995 New Jersey Devils and 2006 Carolina Hurricanes have missed the playoffs the year after winning the Cup.

Last year’s Conn Smythe award winner, LA Kings forward Justin Williams, attains double notoriety. He played for the Hurricanes in 2006-07, when they finished 11th in the Eastern Conference and missed the postseason by four points. Anze Kopitar sums up his feelings after losing to the Oilers.

For one brief, shining moment Wikipedia thought Braden Holtby “owned” the Boston Bruins

Wikipedia, bastion of "truthiness!"

Wikipedia, bastion of “truthiness!”


The playoffs are upon us and it was great to see both of Atlanta’s franchises clinch playoff spots on Thursday night. The Winnipeg Jets waited 19 years to make the playoffs. In the words of Marshall Mathers, “It feels so empty without me.”

Enjoy the Playoffs!