Week 2 – Oui R Awl Kanukz!

THE WEEKLY RANT

Fulty accosted me in the liquor store Friday, pointed to the logo on his hat, and said the page better show some love for the hottest team in the NHL.  Not sure this is what he had in mind.

Anyways, it’s about time we see some Canadian teams up top the standings. Hopefully there are a few of them playing in April/May/June.

In the OFHL this week:

• Haukster & Fulty tie for the big week with 40 points
• Fulty & Vinny are still perfect with 6-0 records
• Stifler had the stinky week with 19 points
• Ren & Stimpy have wins in both weeks
• Orv had the first pick up of the year and grabbed red-hot Richard Panik of CH.  F
• The Week 2 pick-up goes to Orv again. Rumor is that with Jon Quick out for a while, LA Kings might be dressing their goalie coach Bill Ranford. A better pick-up option than Kings back-ups Budaj or Zatkoff?

PLAYER OF THE WEEK

POTW honors could have gone to PK for showing up to his home opener in this…

Three players tied with 8 points for the most this week: JBR’s Cam Talbot EDM, Rolphy’s Brent Burns SJ, & Haukster’s Mike Green DT.

But POTW has gotta go to the ageless Jaromir Jagr. The 44-year-old scored his 750th goal in the NHL on Thursday, becoming only the third playing in history to hit the mark, joining Wayne Gretzky (894) and Gordie Howe (801). Had Jagr not left for the KHL in 2008, playing three seasons in Russia, he’d have passed Howe by now.

The #5 pick in 1990 behind Nolan, Nedved, Primeau, & Ricci.

1990! The year Brett Hull scored 72, Gretzky had 102 assists, The Simpsons began, and Vanilla Ice & MC Hammer were rockin’ your Walkmans.

from the rolphyfiles

SHRAPNEL

When Nic Dowd of the Kings got 2 points against the ‘nucks on Saturday night, The Score app recorded him as “N. Dowd” which we all imagined was his pornstar name. Ranks right up there with other NHLers, Hakan Loob, Randy Wood, & Ron Tugnutt. Then there’s baseball’s Randy Johnson, NASCAR’s Dick Trickle, football’s Dick Butkus, and even Canada’s IOC rep, Dick Pound. C’mon parents! Think about the name.

The Oilers & Jets met in the Heritage Classic on Sunday. “Classic” because it wasn’t -35 outside.

Captain Connor grabs Lil Nugey’s hand to lead him away from the impending danger that is Dustin Byfuglien. That’s leadership, my friends. 

Also in Winnipeg… Patrick Laine was asked if he can keep up his goal-a-game pace and pass his idol, Teemu Selanne, who scored 76 goals in his rookie season…”What was Teemu’s rookie record again? Ok. No problem. So, I can have six off-games.”

In Real Estate News…

T-Man recently had the reality check of selling his home in the Cariboo and purchasing in the megatropolis of Abbotsford. And while that’s a step up in house prices, it’s nothing like Vancouver proper. The Province like to compare the house prices of various celebrity homes to the YVR market. They recently gave this comparison:

Want to buy a house in Vancouver? This modest little Dunbar area gem will put you back about 5 Million. But it has a new roof and fruit trees.

Or, for roughly the same dollar you can grab one of Frank Sinatra’s old haunts just outside Palm Springs. It only has nine bedrooms and 13 bathrooms, and is on just seven-and-a-half acres, but it’s still pretty cool, and is on top of a mountain. Check it:

Best Seat in the Dog House – The Preds opened up against the Hawks last Friday and it was the kind of game that kept fans begging for more. Or begging for treats. Or for squeaky toys. At least in one case.

Jersey Fouls – A junior hockey team in Trenton, Ontario wore these Harambe themed jerseys this week…..

The best part about these jerseys is the matching shorts have a special velcro flap over the crotch. Because, you know.

TRUMP FACT CHECKER

Seeing as the US Election is only days away, It’s time to expose some of Trump’s claims:

1. Ukraine was not Frasier’s brother on the show “Frasier.”
2. Game of Thrones is not an adult version of musical chairs.
3. Jackson Browne is only one person.
4. Malaysia is not the female version of Asia.
5. Pop tarts do not cause ‘splosions.
6. Boeing is a company, not a sound effect
7. Jersey Governor Chris Christie was never in the show “Three’s Company.”
8. Garfunkel is not Garfield’s black cousin.

CUT-DOWN DAY COMING

Every GM will have to cut their rosters to 30 players on Nov 6, which will be the end of wk 4.  At that point you’ll have:

• 13 in your lineup for that week
• 12 on the bench
• 5 on the prospect list (check the rules for their eligibility)

STANDINGS

TEAM	G	W	L	T	PTS	PWk	TP	AVG	%
Fulty	6	6	0	0	12	40	70	35.0	1.000
Vinny	6	6	0	0	12	34	66	33.0	1.000
Cordy	6	4	2	0	8	30	56	28.0	0.667
JBR	6	4	2	0	8	25	53	26.5	0.667
Haukster	6	3	2	1	7	40	59	29.5	0.583
Rolphy	6	3	2	1	7	35	55	27.5	0.583
Ren&Stimpy	6	2	3	1	5	23	43	21.5	0.417
Stifler	6	2	3	1	5	19	38	19.0	0.417
eZ	6	2	4	0	4	27	51	25.5	0.333
Erty	6	2	4	0	4	34	50	25.0	0.333
Derko	6	2	4	0	4	22	45	22.5	0.333
GoJo	6	1	4	1	3	32	49	24.5	0.250
T-Man	6	1	4	1	3	24	41	20.5	0.250
Orv	6	1	5	0	2	22	36	18.0	0.167

PARTING SHOT

Getting Ready for Halloween?

That Black Swan is Cordy’s #1 D-Man

That’s it. GO CUBS!

Week 3 Update

RAMBLINGS

• Cordy & Fulty tie for the Big Week with 37
• Cordy’s in first at 8-0, Fulty also undefeated at 7-0-1
• Derko & GoJo went 3-0
• Stifler has the stinky week with 13
• JBR leads the “Great Auston Matthews Turtle Race” with an 0-9 record
• JBR grabbed Tobias Reider AZ with the pick up
• Week 3 pick up went to a Lottery – JBR got #1,2,3 – Durand got 4,5 – Haukster got #6 — and a “4” was rolled so Stifler gets this week’s pick-up
• Cut-Down Day is Nov 1. Make sure you know the rules/age limits for prospects, etc…

OTHER RAMBLINGS

The Canadian Election is over and we are now blessed to have a drama teacher leading our country. Yes, a “drama teacher.” Bad enough we elected a “teacher,” but a “DRAMA TEACHER?” These are the people who never attend staff meetings unless they need to bitch about who borrowed the box set of Downton Abbey; or that they’re feeling “harassed” because the Chemistry teacher in the room beside them asks if the drama kids could “keep it down a bit” during “Primal Scream Therapy” sessions. C’mon Canada! In what important sector of Canadian society would we say, “We could have a lawyer or an economist lead our organization, but I think it’s time we tried the drama teacher. Oh, and he was also a rafting instructor and camp counselor. Sounds like the perfect leader.”

Oh well, to be fair, it was time for a change and we will see what the future brings. Besides, his father was pseudo-smart. A having a smart daddy who once was a leader has gotta count for something. No?

Rant over…

Blue Jays are done and we can now forget about that distraction called baseball, unless you’re a fan of The Simpsons & The World Series? Check out the ad below.

OFHL TROPHIES

Derko forgot to bring the OFHL Championship trophy to the draft, but he did present it to Fulty at Horty’s last week. Here Fulty celebrates in his typical “low-key” style.

Fulty rockin’ the two-tone pjs

But it will take Fulty a while to get as many titles as Floyd Mayweather Jr.

Worst twitter response, “Is that little green belt the one he used to beat his wife?”

Ever feel bad when your team does an embarrassing screw-up? Check out the 20 WORST PLAYS IN SPORT. Consider Derkos’ collapse in 2008 wedged in there between Greg Norman’s 1996 Masters collapse at #8 and Bayern Munich’s 3 minutes of hell in the 1999 Champions League final (to ManU supporters, this was more of an epic comeback than a Bayern collapse.)

The Kids Are Alright – This year ranks as one of the best rookie classes in a while. Here, SI ranks the NHL’S 10 GREATEST ROOKIE CLASSES SINCE EXPANSION

Here’s another ranking. TOP 30 NHL PLAY-BY-PLAY ANNOUNCERS. ‘Nucks Shorthouse came in at 19. Thanks alot, John Garrett.

THEY HATE US CUZ THEY ANUS — Need another reason to love Evander Kane? The guy takes a helicopter to the Jays-Royals game 3.

Another lovable guy…. Torts is back in the league with the CBJs. If you forgot about him, here’s a nice reminder.

POTW

Habs, Habs, Habs…

They’re the hottest team in the league, had last week’s POTW and have two players tie for the honor this week. PK and Markov each had 7 points.

Weird Russians

In NHL gossip news……More kudos to last weeks’ POTW. He’s going to be a daddy.

Oh, and he also donated thousands of dollars of equipment to WLMHA. CBC.ca Good kid; Good kid.

STANDINGS

TEAM	G	W	L	T	PTS	PWk	TP	AVG	%
Cordy	8	8	0	0	16	37	106	35.3	1.000
Fulty	8	7	0	1	15	37	94	31.3	0.938
Derko	8	6	1	1	13	31	74	24.7	0.813
GoJo	8	6	2	0	12	29	87	29.0	0.750
Rolphy	8	5	3	0	10	30	70	23.3	0.625
Orv	8	4	3	1	9	24	74	24.7	0.563
Vinny	8	4	4	0	8	21	77	25.7	0.500
Erty	8	4	4	0	8	33	65	21.7	0.500
eZ	9	3	5	1	7	15	64	21.3	0.389
T-Man	9	3	6	0	6	27	80	26.7	0.333
Haukster	9	1	8	0	2	25	62	20.7	0.111
Stifler	8	1	7	0	2	13	51	17.0	0.125
JBR	9	0	9	0	0	15	49	16.3	0.000

Week Three – Ron & Don: Canada’s Heartbreak, Canada’s Heart

Have to start with this: Don Cherry pays stirring tribute to Warrant Officer Patrice Vincent and Corporal Nathan Cirillo, two men targeted for being soldiers, and thanks Canada for demonstrating their strength, their courage and their compassion in its wake.

RAMBLINGS

Fulty leads the way with 40 points in week 3 and takes over 1st place with a 8-1 record, Haukster and Cordy each lose their first and drop to 7-1.

It’s not the newbies who have yet to win, but Erty who is o-fer this season.  At least he gets another pick-up.

From Elliotte Friedman’s “30 Thoughts”

• Nathan MacKinnon beat three-time Olympic short-track speed-skating gold medallist Charles Hamelin in a quick race set up by CCM. How much burst does Colorado’s tremendous forward have? A company called PowerScout hockey is starting to track both top speed and acceleration through a computer program that uses three cameras set up around a rink.
• The sample size is small (one-to-six times per player), but growing, and PowerScout (for business reasons) won’t allow its videos to be posted. The data I did see was compelling. MacKinnon was not one of the quickest accelerators (Alexander Ovechkin was first among those tracked, followed by Erik Karlsson, Ryan Kesler and Taylor Hall), but only Carl Hagelin had a faster highest speed, at slightly above 37 kilometres per hour. MacKinnon was tied for second, with Phil Kessel. (You can see some of that information here)
• Not yet public is tracking indicating how much a player skates at a pace above 20 kilometres per hour. I saw a little bit of that information. Only three men stayed at that speed more than 40 percent of the time with at least 10 minutes of five-on-five play. They were Hagelin (44.2 per cent of 13:36), Sidney Crosby (42.4 of 19:19) and Joe Colborne (41.7 of 12:29) (He’s still available, boys.)

POTW

He notched 4 points on Sunday night to bring his weekly total to 10. Who is it?

Poster boy for British National Dental Care

Look who showed up at the Habs Halloween party…..

Michael “PK” Jackson is a Thriller in his Habs 3rd jersey

STANDINGS

TEAM	G	W	L	T	PTS	PWk	TP	AVG	%
Fulty	9	8	1	0	16	40	104	34.7	0.889
Cordy	8	7	1	0	14	31	101	33.7	0.875
Hauksta	8	7	1	0	14	33	97	32.3	0.875
Zwierz	8	6	2	0	12	37	87	29.0	0.750
Rolphy	8	5	3	0	10	24	94	31.3	0.625
Derko	8	5	3	0	10	29	92	30.7	0.625
GoJo	8	5	3	0	10	33	87	29.0	0.625
Vinny	8	3	4	1	7	31	80	26.7	0.438
TMan	9	3	6	0	6	36	79	26.3	0.333
Orv	8	2	6	0	4	24	67	22.3	0.250
Shifler	8	1	7	0	2	8	44	14.7	0.125
JBRow	9	1	8	0	2	11	39	13.0	0.111
Erty	9	0	8	1	1	21	58	19.3	0.056

 

Week 2 & Erty’s Top Bunk! – revised

(I made a mistake in the previous standings – revised here Mon Oct 14 10:30am)

WEEK TWO – Nobody is perfect and nobody is winless anymore. ERTY has a mediocre week with 25 points but goes 2-1 and sits atop the standings with 10 points, one ahead of FULTY, two up on CORDY & HAUKSTER.
THE PICK-UP for this week goes to ROLPHY. Derko Grabbed Vlasic SJ
REMINDER: Cut down day will be after week 4 — OCTOBER 27th.

TEAM	G	W	L	T	PTS	PWk	TP	AVG	%
E	6	5	1	0	10	25	53	26.5	0.833
F	6	4	1	1	9	41	63	31.5	0.750
C	6	4	2	0	8	26	56	28.0	0.667
H	6	4	2	0	8	31	55	27.5	0.667
D	5	3	2	0	6	35	59	29.5	0.600
Z	5	2	3	0	4	29	52	26.0	0.400
O	6	2	4	0	4	24	47	23.5	0.333
G	5	1	3	1	3	29	51	25.5	0.300
T	5	1	3	1	3	32	51	25.5	0.300
V	5	1	3	1	3	30	49	24.5	0.300
R	5	1	4	0	2	21	41	20.5	0.200

POTW honors for wk2 should be shared between best friends Subban & Crosby as each got 7 points, or to Tomas “Chris” Hertl for his 4 goal effort, but when you are as hot as Mark Giordano has been, you deserve the props.  Especially when you are having your best season since you ripped it up 10 years ago with 2 goals and 3 assists playing for the Omaha Ak-Sar-Ben Knights of the ECHL Jr. League.

Giordano tosses pucks to fans in the stands. Fails miserably.

Alexei Yemelin, anyone?

The Habs 2004 2nd rounder showed up for his first ever NHL camp and impressed on his first shift.  He’s the guy in white.  Thems some sweet elbows!  PK Subban should take notes.